Monthly Archives: September 2019

Your Child’s Bipolar Illness Can Put Your Marriage On The Rocks

Bipolar disorder can be seen in any child of any age.  And very much like that of an adult, they have mood swings, from mania to depression, and they can be violent as well.

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Our Son Is Our Treasure We Almost Lost To Bipolar Illness

My husband and I waited for years before our first child was born.  The happiness that we felt the very moment we found out that I was pregnant was beyond words.  We did everything to make ours and the baby’s journey through my pregnancy smooth sailing, something that we handled with excitement and care for the baby. We already felt how much we loved him even though he was still inside me.

When he came into the world, we were very thankful that he was healthy and he seemed like a happy baby.  Like other excited parents, we documented every progress of his growth, his every first – first baby talk, first steps, first run, and the first day of school.  We tried to give him everything that sometimes we were warned by friends and relatives that he might grow up to be a spoiled kid.

While in grade school, his teachers noticed some mood swings, and then he started exhibiting violent behaviors toward his classmates and with one of his teachers.  He can be very unruly when he’s home, but I never thought he would be unmanageable even in school.  The school summoned us multiple times, and we were requested to undergo some counseling with him, and so we did but to no avail, I guess.

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My husband is the disciplinarian type, and he and my kid started to have fights about his attitude, especially the way he disrespects us and others.  Of course, I would come to my son’s rescue.  I tried to tell my husband not to be too hard on our son as this could just be a phase, or just the result of us showering him with so much attention and material things and too much pampering.

Things got worse in school and in our house.  There were days when my son would not come out of his room and days when he would flee and wander the streets at night when he was unable to sleep.  These things made my husband mad for real that often we end up having an argument.   I can feel that slowly he is becoming distant not just from our child but me as well.

How Counseling Helped Us Save The Marriage And Our Son

The everyday fighting, arguments, me siding my son, his always coming home late and becoming less and less caring had added to my burden.  I felt like I was all alone looking after my son and supporting him.   I felt deserted by my husband.

I sought counsel, and during the session, I mentioned how my son’s behavior would be the cause of our disagreements.  Our relationship started to turn sour since my son became uncontrollable.   My counselor advised that I have my son checked as she sensed that there’s something wrong with him, and so I followed her advice.  She recommended a doctor, and we visited him.  After a few visits, the doctor confirmed that my son has bipolar disorder.  His tantrums, insomnias, eloping behaviors, especially his violent acts are not just about puberty or being a spoiled kid after all.

I explained this to my husband, and I can see clearly from the way he looked that he felt like a loser for having a son with such disorder.  I encouraged him that maybe it would be better if we both undergo counseling and also bring our son to a therapist who specializes in children with bipolar disorder.   It’s hard convincing him, but after some time, he agreed to come with me.  The therapist explained to us our family’s complicated situation – how it can ruin our relationship as husband and wife if we will focus on its adverse effect in our lives, how it can destroy their relationship as father and son, and what will eventually happen if my husband continues to give our son the cold shoulder and just imposing punishments without hearing him out.

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Slowly, with the help of our counselors and our son’s therapist, my husband learned to embrace our situation.   He has participated in the interventions my son needed to reduce or even avoid his mania and depressions.   He now knows how to handle the circumstances correctly, and the best part is that we are now in this together.  Though there are still times when he runs out of patience, he can readily shift back when I remind and calm him down.

Managing a kid with bipolar disorder can put any marriage on the rocks, especially if the kid is not yet diagnosed, and the parents are just focusing on his misconducts.

Rowdy behaviors are part of the childhood and teenage years.  It’s natural for them to feel irritable, angry, hyperactive, rebellious sometimes.  However, if these behaviors have gone severe, becoming out of control, and causing problems especially between your relationship as couples, it may mean more than just undergoing a phase in life.

Top 3 Ways To Bond With Your Family

Finding out that your child has bipolar disorder can be challenging on your part. For sure, you have no idea how to handle the signs and symptoms of this disorder. At the same time, you are also not prepared to explain to other people the condition of your kid. You will find it difficult to make others understand why your child acts differently or why he has specific quirks. Aside from this, you will also start to doubt your capacity as a parent.

 

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During these moments, it can be easy to give up right away and just let yourself drown in misery. At this point in your article, we want to remind you that it is not yet the end of the world. Just because your child or kid has been diagnosed with a medical condition does not mean that there is no longer hope for both of you. Take note that you can still make things right for everyone. One of the tips that you may want to consider is to spend more quality time with your family. Keep in mind that the more you bond with your family, the stronger you become in facing all challenges.

 

Below is a list of the effective ways on how you can bond with your family:

 

Have Brunch On Weekends

 

Teach your child how to enjoy brunch on weekends. Use this opportunity to bond with your kid and to talk about updates from his life. Let him know that you are interested in learning about how his week went and if he has any concerns at schools. Brunch is also the perfect time to teach your kid some perfect manners. Feel free to invite some relatives to come with you on brunch so that the gathering will be more fun.

 

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Travel Abroad

 

Another exciting way for the family to bond is through traveling abroad. All you have to do is to select the country that you want to visit. Once you have finalized this important detail, it is time to look for the perfect city of that country. What are the kinds of activities that you are looking forward to? Is everyone in the family coming? How many days do you have for vacation? You must answer these questions to help you with the planning process.

 

Go On A Road Trip

 

If you have a limited time for vacation, do not fret because you can always go on a road trip for the weekend. The nice thing about this idea is that you can always go back to your place overnight. At the same time, it is also an affordable way of spending quality time with your beloved family members. That road trip is going to help you get close to your child. If you are not sure how to do this, do not hesitate to ask for some ideas from friends. They are most likely going to share their experiences!

 

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Always find time to share with everyone in your family if you want your kid to become responsible just like you.

 

 

Parenting 101: How To Handle Your Kid’s Attitude

One of the common challenges that parents encounter is finding out that their children have a problematic attitude to deal with. Whether you like it or not, there is a possibility that your kid will become a monster. You will start to wonder where he got his attitude or why he started acting out. Going through this process can be disheartening and stressful, especially if you are a single parent. Do not worry because we are going to provide you with different things to know if you want to handle your kid’s attitude.

 

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Before anything else, we want to emphasize that it is imperative on your part to act now if you want your child to become a better person. Do not wait before it becomes too late for you to work on the matter. Stop denying to yourself that nothing is wrong if your kid manifests a bad behavior. Instead, focus on finding ways on how you can help him change his ways.

 

Here are the things that you need to know:

 

Be Disciplined

 

As much as possible, find time to develop a disciplinarian attitude. Just because your child is acting up does not mean that you have to answer to his needs immediately. Instead, allow him to have tantrums until he gets tired. However, do not do something that you will end up regretting. Remind yourself that you can still show your authority to your child without being violent. Learn how to be a good disciplinarian.

 

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Use Positive Reinforcement

 

Teach your child how to act nice and great at all times by using positive reinforcement. All you must do is to take note of the good deeds that he does. For example, whenever he completes a task or assignment, be sure to find time to appreciate it. If possible, give him a reward or a gift. The more you do this, the more he will become more accustomed to performing helpful deeds. Do not forget to explain to him why he deserves the gift that he will receive.

 

Communicate Well

 

Do not be afraid to make an effort to communicate efficiently with your child. Stop relying on other people to give you updates about what keep your kid busy. Instead, be the one to talk to your child directly. Never make the mistake of spending most of your time in the office or your business. Remind yourself that no value or amount of money can ever bring back lost time with your child. If you think something is wrong with your offspring, do not hesitate to discuss it with him. Find a way to get him to open up to you.

 

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If there is one thing that you need to know, it is the fact that you are a fantastic parent. You can do everything that you set your mind to. Make sure that you continue to provide love to your child at all times. Be the best version of your parenting life!